Whirlwind

Well life really has a way of throwing curve balls at you. Recently I have become unemployed not gonna go into it but it sucks (and no I didnt steal or anything dumb like that!). My immediate response was freak out! "Oh my gosh I have bills to pay and rent and etc what am I gonna do?" Im not gonna lie I didnt get out of bed hardly at all for like three days. It was rough. But I have a few AMAZING friends who really helped me realize that it will all be okay. So I got out of bed and am applying for jobs. I already have a few interviews this week!

This weekend I came down to help my mom move. She is moving in with my little sister, she lives rents a room out a 3 bedroom house by Chapman University and my moms renting out a room so shes finally gonna have a nice place to live, unlike where shes at now. Im happy for my mom and sister its gonna be fun for them! Ive been looking alot at my relationship with my mom and well I realized what do we really know about our parents? Like honestly have we ever really sat down and talked to them about our lives? Not until we get older right? So during my teen and adolescent years I really think I misunderstood my mom. I love my mom! She is the strongest and toughest person I know! Shes been through soo much and theres soo much she gave up and did just for us kids and I applaud her for that. She is an amazing woman who deserves soo much out of life and well its finally coming full cirlce. She has an amazing job in management at John Wayne Airport now. :-D Im so proud of her. She applied on a whim and 5 months later got the job. How  cool!

Ive been wondering alot about my life trying to figure out what to do with it where to go? Who to bring along lol....been really re-evalutating my life and all and well I'm still not sure and I think for once in my life Im okay with saying that. Im okay with saying that I dont know where Ill be in hell the next month what ill be doing but the key to it all is well Im HAPPY!

If you would have met me a year ago you probably wouldnt have liked me and been wondering whats wrong with me or etc. I would have worried myself sick trying to please you and make you happy and in the long run just being a kiss ass and it would have gotten me nowhere. Now you meet me and most people like me right away then they start to get to know me and decide from there. But the biggest difference now is if you dont like me Im not gonna try and kill myself and go way out of the way to please you to like me. No one likes a kiss ass lol. If you dont like me than your lose but Im not gonna be rude to you either just cause you dont like me. Lol. I know most of you are thinking why am I saying this. But heres why. This is a HUGE accomplishment for me. I worry WAY too much about what others percieve me or think of me that I lost my way and never really ever learned what I wanted or liked or who I was and now Im finally learning all that and its amazing!

So far heres what I know;

• I Love rootbeer and BBQ sauce
• Im a huge sports fan and LOVE the ANGELS not too big on basketball and I realized my love for football is not as HUGE as I thought but im still a big fan. GO COWBOYS! lol
• I love to sing, dance and teach (teach anything)
• I dont like tomatoes cause their slimy
• If I had to choose between reading a great book late at night cuddled in front of a fire with coffee or hot coco or going out to some big party where i know only a handful of people and everyones gonna get drunk off their butts. I choose reading.
• I could just lay in the sand all night and satir at the stars and listen to the ocean (and i thought i hated the beach)
• I like to cook, but hate dishes (who doesnt lol)
• I love my true friends and will always spoil them because their the best (and you know who you are)

Theirs just a few things!

Anywho life is a whirlwind right now but I think in the end ill be okay :-D

love you all dearly!